Counting Stars
by LeannaBananaVII
Summary: Lately I've been losing sleep dreaming about the things that we could be. I've been praying hard instead of counting dollars we'll be counting stars. The unimaginable has happened and now Castiel is trapped in a world where Dean and Sam no longer know him. rated M for later chapters This is my first supernatural fic so be kind


It was 3am on a Tuesday when the skies darkened with harsh clouds that blocked out the stars. Castiel, still not used to his human needs, found that many nights he had trouble sleeping. On nights like this Cas would grab a chilled bottle of water and sit on the steps of the bunker observing nature, so as not to disturb the others. Cas spent many nights in this way, but he had never witnessed a cloud cover like the one he saw this night.

_This is not a normal cloud cover _he thought to himself noting how quickly the clouds had rolled in and how much they were obscuring his vision. Stumbling down the stairs back into the bunker Castiel was met with more darkness. _This is wrong_ he thought. He was sure he had left at least one light on for himself. Cas thrust his arms out in front of him searching for a light source.

A loud crack sounded, the force of which seemed to shake the whole world. Castiel stumbled forward grasping onto the railing in front of him to give him some stability. _What is this that is happening?_ Cas thought trying to wrap his mind around what was happening. Angel radio was being shockingly quiet and Castiel knew no good could come from this.

"What the hell!" Cas heard what could only be Dean shouting from the hallway near his room. He could tell from his tone that Dean was scared even if he would never admit it to anyone. Castiel had learned to tell a lot about the Winchester brothers from the little hints they give away in their normal behaviors.

"Dean? Cas!" That was Sam; both men must have been alerted by the uproar. It must have put them in hunter mode, Sam and Dean could shift from relaxed to ready to attack faster than anyone Castiel had ever known. The lights flickered briefly allowing some visibility. Sam and Dean had managed to find each other and upon spotting Cas on the balcony began moving towards him. Hearing some stumbling and cursing as the Winchester brothers made their way up the stairs towards him. Darkness swallowed them again but the three men were finally reunited.

"Cas what's happening?!" Dean demanded in a harsh angry tone. The building was still shaking, throwing the three men about. The walls began to crack breaking apart; suddenly flashes of light filled the sky as lightening flashed. A great wind was blowing about in mad gusts. Buildings, rubble, all sorts of debris flew through the air. A giant black portal seemed to be ripping the sky apart.

"Cas what's happening?!" Dean shouted again. Cas wished he had an answer for Dean but he didn't. There was still nothing coming through on Angel Radio, it was as if all the angels that were on earth had disappeared all at once.

Suddenly Sam was ripped away from them a surprised yell torn from him as he sailed through the air. The wind ripped him right towards the black hole, effectively disappearing him from Dean and Cas' sight. "Sam!" Dean yelled and before Cas could stop him Dean had let go of the railing he and Cas had been clinging to and went flying after Sam. As with Sam the wind shot Dean straight towards the black hole sucking him up into nothingness.

"DEEEAAANNN!" Cas screamed after his friend his heart wrenching as he got no response. The only sound Cas could hear was the howling of the angry wind. Castiel was having trouble seeing, just a whirling blackness full of debris and an angry howling filled Casstiel's senses.

"Dean! Sam!" For hours, it seemed, Cas screamed for the two brothers he considered family until his voice was hoarse and broken. The powerful wind had not left up this entire time and there was no evidence that any other entities, human and or otherwise, were around. Weary his arms began to tire out from fighting to keep him stationary. He wasn't sure how long the piece of earth he was clinging to would remain where it was, but he knew he couldn't let go. He tried to keep his hope up, Dean and Sam had turned the tides many times when all seemed hopeless. He knew if he just held on a bit longer everything would be okay.

Still as more and more time passed Castiel began to question himself, _Is this really my death? After all of this fighting this is really how it ends? _Left with only his disheartening thoughts Cas gave up, blacking out from exhaustion and sailing towards his oblivion.

"Cassie! You're going to be late!" Castiel's eyes shot open his sheets soaked with sweat. _Sheets…_ he questioned staring down at the sheets pooled around his waist. How had he gotten in a bed? Where was he? Where were Dean and Sam?

Castiel looked around the unfamiliar room, clothes, books, and other various personal items were strewn about the room. Whose room was this, it was obviously lived in by someone. A few aged photographs on the wall drew Castiel's attention. The picture which seemed to be quite worn, as if well-loved was Jimmy Novak, his vessel, age, from what Cas could tell, five. Was he in the Novak home? How had he ended up here? A sharp stomping resounded from behind Cas and he turned just as the door swooshed open. A woman with deep red hair lightly streaked with grey pulled up into a neat tight bun stood in the doorway. She wore a knee length blue cotton dress with a white apron tied about her waist. She smiled and tsked at him before walking to the closet. Even though she was acting strangely and in appearance had aged many years Cas would know this woman anywhere. "Anna…" Cas breathed out, Anna had died how could she be here?

Sharp disappointing eyes turned on Castiel. "That's mom to you young man. Just because you turned fifteen today doesn't mean you can disrespectful." As she said this strange thing to him she rifled through the closet until she had a complete outfit in her hands. She passed them off to Castiel who just stared at them confusedly. "Are you going to get dressed or do you plan on going to school in your underwear?" Castiel looked down at himself and sure enough he was only wearing white cotton boxers. He flushed a sense of shame flooding him as the entirety of his situation came upon him. Anna's red brows knit in concern at Castiel's reaction. "Are you feeling alright dear?" She asked brushing a hand across his forehead in a motherly fashion.

"I- … Yes…" Cas managed to croak out. "I'll dress and be down in a moment." Castiel said turning his back on the woman who claimed to be his mother. His mind was reeling as this older version of Anna left the room. She must have been in her mid-forties at least, and she had said today was his fifteenth birthday. He looked about the room again, a mirror sat on the wall across from him. He moved towards it studying his reflection. The young man who was staring back at him was familiar but not. The face was Jimmy Novak's but it was a young man's face not the face of the older man who had become his vessel.

Castiel began dressing himself, puzzling over his situation. Even these clothes, which were well worn obviously loved by someone, seemed to fit him perfectly. How was it that he came to this place?

Castiel, having finally dressed himself, left the unfamiliar room to an even more unfamiliar hallway. Lining the hall were pictures of a seemingly happy family. Pictures with Anna in varying ages, many pictures of Jimmy in toddlerhood. Castiel moved forward staring at a particular picture of Jimmy, it was a classic childhood photo, he was aged about two with colorful blocks in front of him spelling out his name, but the blocks didn't spell Jimmy… They spelled Castiel.

"Castiel James Novak get your keester down here right! Now!" Anna hollered from downstairs. Castiel sucked in a deep breath. Even though Cas couldn't remember a single thing from this life that tone Anna took still put a fear in Cas he couldn't explain. Taking off down the stairs through a very modern home Cas managed to locate Anna in the kitchen.

"Oh Cassie so good of you to join us." An oh so familiar voice filtered over to him, seemingly wrapping around his body. Castiel whirled around and sitting on a nice oak chair at the table eating breakfast as if it was the most normal thing that has ever happened, was Crowley. Castiel's jaw dropped the King of Hell was sitting in what was supposed to be Anna's and Castiel's home eating BREAKFAST! "Aw Cassie I know I'm good looking but you don't have to gawk at me." Crowley smirked adding an exaggerated wink for effect. "Oi, I'm just fucking with you kid, lighten up it's your birthday." Crowley broke out in a grin and tossed a small package wrapped in matte black paper to him. Castiel caught it staring at it curiously.

"Castiel don't be rude. Open it!" Anna chastised putting a hand on her hip, she had a bit of pancake batter smidged on her face.

Slowly Castiel unwrapped the box inside was a small electrical device that Sam had told him was called an Ipod, it supposedly produces music but Cas had never used one before. He looked up to Anna and Crowley questioningly, why had he been given this?

Crowley frowned, "Is it not the one you wanted?" Castiel was shocked Crowley seemed to be genuinely concerned about his feelings… At this point the most logical action Castiel could think of was to play along for now.

"No it is…" Cas said cautiously. "Thank you." He pocketed the small device making a mental note to fiddle with it later.

"Well you boys must be off or you'll surely be late." Anna said shoving a backpack and jacket into Castiel's grasp. You boys? Did she mean that he AND Crowley were leaving… together? As if to answer his question Crowley hooked his arm around his shoulder and led Cas out the door. Once outside Crowley headed over to a black on black Range Rover, reluctantly Castiel followed along.

Once inside the car Crowley turned to study Castiel. "Listen Cassie…" He cleared his throat, "Castiel, I know that you and I have never really gotten along but I really care about your mom alright…" Though his words seemed sincere enough, Crowley's voice still had that annoying- albeit charming lilt to it that he used to manipulate people. Castiel's distrust must have been plain on his face because Crowley scoffed and rolled his eyes dramatically. "Look Clarence I don't want to have to waste my energy fighting with you every time I see you. I have much better uses for my energy." Crowley laughed throwing a sideways glance at Castiel.

"Aren't you supposed to be taking me to school?" Castiel asked plainly not justifying Crowley's comment with a response. Castiel wasn't sure where he was and Crowley didn't _seem_ to be the King of Hell here, but that didn't change who he was as a person… if he was a person. Cas really needed to find Dean and Sam. Maybe the school would have one of those computers that Sam always has, then he could try and get some information from it. It was a long shot but he had to try.

A tense twenty minute car ride later and Cas was standing outside John Adams High School. The place was crawling with teenagers which made Castiel tense until he realized that he was also a teenager and would have no problem blending in. He shifted his backpack nervously on his back. Where did he go now? He had no idea how human schools worked or what was expected of him. This was his first day of school after all.

"Heeey Clarence!" A familiar shout sounded from behind him. Cas whirled around to see a much younger, but still glamorously the same, Meg. Without thinking Castiel rushed forward and pulled her into his arms! She was alive! Meg was alive. "Oh Meg…" He murmured into her shoulder.

"Whoa there Cas, you swear like you didn't see me just yesterday." She said with a laugh draping her arm around his shoulder and steering him into the school. This was good he and Meg appeared to be friends, maybe she could help him get to a computer.

"So I had that dream again last night." She said casually referring to something she thought he would know.

"Oh… really?" Cas said purposely leaving the phrase open ended so that Meg would infer whatever she wanted from it. Cas could be convincing, he could play along, at least he hoped he could.

"Yeah the one where I'm a demon and you're an angel and we go on really graphic adventures together." She said with a light laugh like it was the most normal thing for her to say. Meg seemed to have at least some subconscious memory of the life that Cas was trying to get back to. This was great news for Castiel because if Meg had some memories it would make it easier for him to convince her of his story, and if he could make Meg remember then maybe he could get Sam and Dean to remember too.

"Don't get so serious faced about it Cassie. It's just a dream, even if you are a cute little angel." She said pinching Castiel's cheek affectionately. "So are you ready to start the new book in English class? Douche Winchester is presenting the first two chapters to the class today." She said her voice lowering with irritation.

"Dean?" Cas guessed that's who she was referring to. He could remember Meg calling him that in their dealings in the past.

"Yeah that little shit! He fucking coasts through school because of his little finger paintings. AND YET he still got held back two years!" She scoffed, "I mean, I have dreams about angels and demons too but I don't go parading it around for attention." She spat vehemently. She couldn't really mean Dean, he thought, finger painting didn't sound like something he would do.

Castiel allowed Meg to lead him through the halls, apparently they shared a locker because Meg "couldn't be bothered" with hers so he was able to claim his things without much trouble. Castiel began to relax a little bit, he didn't seem to be in any immediate danger. Meg seemed to be a reliable ally for now and perhaps she could help him get back to his dimension… or universe… or world… He wasn't too sure on the logistics yet.

Castiel quickly realized that he had vastly underestimated the dangers of high school. On their way to English class Castiel had his backpack torn out of his hands, he was shoved to the floor, and the contents of his bag dumped over his head. Cas could hear Meg's indignant cries as she too was shoved down. "Fuck you Novak! Who said you could be in this hallway?!" That voice tore a hole through Castiel, he looked up and sure enough was met with a pair of startling yellow eyes.

"Ay! Az, we are gonna be late for class so stop kissing your boyfriend and let's go." A dark haired boy with lean muscles called from down the hallway. Azazel glared at him before fixing his eyes back on Castiel.

"This isn't over Novak." He hissed before kicking Castiel one last time.

"Ugh I hate Azazel! He is such a punk!" Meg shouted as she pulled Castiel to his feet, together they began collecting his things, but one book was missing. It was then a third set of hands came to his attention. Standing before him was Sam Winchester, at least Castiel thought it was but he was so young. This Sam was equal in height to Cas, a welcome change from his normal towering. He was so thin, almost underfed but his cheeks still had the fat of boyhood. His clothes were ill fitting, a combination of too short in length and too long in size. However the most noticeable difference between Cas's Sam and this younger Sam was how terrified he looked. Castiel had never seen this level of fear upon his features before.

"H-hey… I saw what… that guy did to you." Sam stammered looking at his feet, shuffling them nervously. "I don't like bullies." He handed Castiel his book looking bashful.

"God kid, what you like five? What are you doing here?" Meg asked in a snotty tone, she thrust one hip out placing her hand upon it. Cas sent her a sidelong glance. Why was she being so mean to Sam he had just helped them.

Sam's face went from embarrassed to hard and unrelenting in a flash. "My name is Sam not kid and I was pushed forward a grade, I'm a freshman I'm supposed to be here." He growled out glaring at Meg in a heated fashion.

"Oh your douche Winchester's freaky kid brother." She shot out with a laugh. "Man did you get all the intelligence genes or something? 'Cause your brother sure is stupid. I mean-" She was cut off by the second bell. "Ugh Cas we have to get to class. Later tiny Winchester." She dismissed Sam with a wave dragging Castiel into a nearby class room. The two "friends" took seats at the back of the class settling in with the rest of the kids. Castiel observed his new class mates trying to find any faces he might recognize. Sitting four seats away from him was Dean. He looked the same yet different, much younger obviously, but there was more to it than that. This Dean was really withdrawn not the boisterous personality that he was used to. While everyone was surrounded by their friends Dean was on his own doodling quietly on a piece of paper. Castiel heard a snort from his left, he turned to find Meg staring at him amusedly.

"God Cas stare at him any harder and your eyeballs are going to fall out of your head." She said with a nasty laugh lightly punching him in the arm. Castiel lifted his hands to feel his eyes, they didn't seem like they were going to fall out of his head. Was this something that happened to humans often, he looked over at Dean longingly, he wished he could ask him.

The teacher swept in the class gaining everyone's attention. "Alright Mr. Winchester I believe you were going to start off our class today with the first two chapters of The Things They Carried by Tim O'Brien." The groan of desperation that erupted from Dean as he moved to th front of the classroom was one of the most heart wrenching sounds Cas had ever heard Dean make, and they had been in many desperate situations together in the past.

Dean moved to the front of the class room tugging nervously on his flannel shirt as he tried to find the page he wanted to read from. "It's the first chapter Winchester it shouldn't be too hard to find the page." The teacher chastised cruelly, Dean swallowed the lump in his throat and began to try and read.

"First Lieuten-tenant Jimmy Cross carried letters from a g-girl named M-m-martha…" This was the only part that Cas was able to understand for as Dean's stutter got worse the quieter he made his voice and the faster he began to read until no one in the class could understand him anymore.

"What did Juh JUH juh Jimmy Cross say Dean no one can understand you!" Meg said cackling evily. Dean locked eyes with her as she cruelly mimicked his stutter before throwing his book at her and storming out of the classroom angrily. Without thinking about it Cas jumped to his feet.

"You shouldn't have done that Meg…" Cas said sadly before following after Dean he hoped he would be able to find him.


End file.
